How did I do a whole relationship series without talking about being single and being married? Sorry oh! But get ready for it because for the next few weeks, I’ll be doing another series on singleness and marriage.

If you are African, you’ve heard it one way or another either about yourself or about a sister, brother, cousin, someone who is single… Every married relative (and by that, I mean anyone who knows your parents) feels personally invested in giving you unsolicited advice and reminders that your clock is ticking. It is time to get married!

There is pressure for single people to get married in most societies, but for people from collectivistic cultures that pressure seems to be a lot higher. After all, the whole premise of collectivism is prioritizing groups, so how can you do that as an unmarried person? And what happens to the family name if it ends with you?

But the truth that some of our African parents and relatives won’t tell you is that they are not happily married. Actually, maybe they don’t want to think about it so it’s easier to focus on you being single. Or maybe the nature of their marriage doesn’t even matter to them because they are married and that’s the most important thing. They can keep their status and they can say, “I’m married.” 

And what is the Christian view on all of this? Singleness or marriage? Does God want all people to be married? Are all single people doing something terribly wrong which is why they are single? Did all married people do something right that single people are missing? Is it possible that people’s single lives could actually be a blessing from God? You do know not everyone wants to get married right? And that is equally a good thing as someone who chooses to get married?

All these questions and thoughts… you’ll need to stay tuned for the next few weeks to read on being single, being married, and a Christian perspective about all this.