6 practical ways parents can relieve stress about their children not getting married

Oh how time flies! In 2020, I wrote a relationship series, actually two relationship series. The first was on the tensions that arise between African parents raising their African American children in the U.S. and the second was on marriage and singleness within an African context. Why did Africans get married back then and how […]
The Chosen scene – Does God really trust me?

Last week, I ended the post saying God trusts us so much to handle tensions in our lives. He wants us to plan for the long term yet focus on the present. This life is not going to be perfect and that was never the promise. The promise is that God will be present with us […]
How to live in the present and manage worry about the future

Have you ever wondered how paradoxical it can feel to plan for the future yet live in the present? Two weeks ago, I wrote about How to think long-term in an instant gratification world. But it can be tempting to begin worrying about your long-term goals. That’s why some people don’t set long-term goals. It’s […]
How to think long-term in an instant gratification world

Selfies, text messages, live streaming, Netflix, instant coffee, microwavable dinners, these are just a few of the things we can get “right now” at the tip of our fingers. We don’t have to wait. I remember when I was a child growing up in Cameroon, there were a few series on television that the women […]
How to get through depression using the Psalms

Are you feeling tired and worn out? You might have lost interest in doing anything. It’s difficult to get a good night’s sleep or the opposite, you are sleeping all the time. Maybe your mind is spiraling in different directions, and you don’t know how to silence it so that you can focus on one […]
What is the meaning of your name?

I get that question a lot. And then when my response is “I don’t know,” I can see the disappointment on their faces, followed by the judgment of “how come you don’t know?” All the Nigerians silently say, “abomination!” They don’t say it out loud, but our conversation always ends with “you need to find […]
8 reasons why you might not be getting the most out of your therapy sessions

Many people today have been to therapy, are currently in therapy, or are considering going for therapy. (By the way, if you are considering going to therapy and you reside in Pennsylvania, I am currently accepting new clients here!) Psychotherapy is hard work. Although it is not the visible type of work like working on […]
The silent sufferer

Happy almost 4th of July! It looks like July 4th weekend is easily becoming my poetry weekend. At this time 2 years ago, I wrote a poem about rest. This time, it’s about suffering in silence. We’ve all experienced some sort of hardships in our lives. Sometimes it can be difficult to talk to others […]
Slow down and spend this time with God

For some reason today I am drawn to write something that will help you (yes you) process. I don’t know what you are going through and I usually don’t write like this, but the Holy Spirit led me here, so here we are. Many of us struggle with being still. We live in a busy […]
Why are boundaries so hard for people from African cultures?

This is the story: Susan (let’s call her that) has been complaining about not wanting to go to this event, but not only that, she has been tasked with making the fried plantains for the event. But she doesn’t want to do any of it. What’s the event? It’s a party that some fellow members […]