Important things you need to know about Highly Sensitive People

Have you heard of the term highly sensitive personality or HSP? Well, I am one of those highly sensitive people and it turns out that so are 15 to 20 percent of the population. That is almost every 5^th of your family or friends regardless of gender. Therefore, if you haven’t heard of it, here’s your chance to understand yourself or a loved one better.

The word, “sensitive” has different meanings depending on who’s talking, and many have used it in a negative way to mean “weak” or “difficult.” Let’s put all of that aside and look at this with fresh eyes because being an HSP is quite different.

The scientific term for highly sensitive personality (HSP) is sensory processing sensitivity (SPS), terms that were coined by Dr. Elaine Aron and her husband, Dr. Arthur Aron. High sensitivity does not mean shyness, neurosis, or introversion even though about 70% of highly sensitive people (HSPs) are introverts. HSP is a personality trait (not a disorder) that entails greater cognitive processing and higher sensitivity in the central nervous system. People with this trait process external and internal stimuli thoroughly due to differences in their central nervous system; they have a lot more filters than others. Their nervous system is designed to pick up cues easily. Thus, HSPs have great awareness and insight, and experience the world and their own bodies with high accuracy and perception. However, it consumes energy and takes time to process and make decisions.

People with this trait can’t shut it off, but they can refine their abilities. Thus, telling an HSP to “toughen up” or “just get over it” can be like telling someone with one leg to use both legs.

If I could personally thank Dr. Aron, I would. I remember crying through her book when I first read it, “The highly sensitive person: How to thrive when the world overwhelms you.” I felt “for the first time someone really gets me.” It was such a spiritual experience, but I digress.

At this point, if you are too anxious to find out if you have this trait, here is a self-test you can take right now.

How does the trait play out in real life?

To name a few characteristics, highly sensitive people might…

Demonstrate better than average ability to spot errors or differences
Be highly conscientious
Be highly creative
Concentrate deeply with a high degree of focus
Be aware of even small changes in the environment (and can be easily distracted by them)
Process material to a deeper level
Be specialists at fine motor movements
Possess deep awareness of their own thoughts and body condition
Be drawn to be of service to others
Be aware of bodily signs and symptoms
Be more reactive to pain, pleasure, medication, etc

Of course, everything here varies per person, but as you can see these aspects could have effects positively and negatively on the HSP.

The brain of a highly sensitive person can be easily overwhelmed when there is not enough capacity to process stimuli. A few things that could trigger this are large gatherings, loud noises, conflicts even on TV, injustice, unfamiliar or new environments, and unrealistic expectations from others. When an HSP’s system is overloaded, they could become withdrawn, reactive, impatient, or irritable. This is the point that most people associate with “sensitive,” but it is more like over-stimulation or overwhelmed sensitivity.

What helps to manage and refine an HSP's abilities?

Learning and accepting your trait including its strengths and its limitations
Understanding your limits and knowing when to say no
Getting enough sleep and rest
Making every effort to reduce stress by taking care of your psychological, emotional, spiritual, and physical needs (food, water, sleep, exercise, social contact)
Having a positive perspective; anything less threatening makes life feel safe
Incorporating yoga, massages, and stillness in your life
Having constant breaks throughout your day and throughout your year, this includes taking vacations or time off
Giving yourself more time and space to feel, think, and do things that are rejuvenating
Patience, kindness, and self-compassion when you can’t explain why you are feeling all you are feeling or for some of us, why our bodies hurt
Appreciation of what you bring to the table
A peaceful and orderly environment to thrive

From one HSP to another

On a personal note, I struggled with being an HSP for a long time. For the first 20 something years of my life, I felt shy and misunderstood frequently. Then, when I learned about the trait and read the book I mentioned above, although I gained understanding, it felt like a burden. I went through periods of wanting to be tougher. I felt like this was my torn in my side and asked God to take it away. It felt frustrating to notice things that others didn’t notice. Sometimes, it seemed everyone was running ahead while I was still processing or recovering from fatigue. It has been a journey to not just accept my HSP but embrace and love it.

Now, I think it is my superpower. I see how God uses it in fulfilling His purposes through me. I see it when I am in therapy with clients, I see it when I am writing, and I see it when I have to speak up about something that needs to be done differently because maybe only a few of us noticed.

I realize that my God-given HSP gift requires nurturing. Thus, I accept when I need to have a slow day because I am drained, or when I need more time to think, feel, journal, pray, sleep, take a bath, etc. If I’m unable to get something done at a certain time, I just let people know. I avoid working in environments where I feel tasked or overwhelmed. I avoid going for multiple events in one day because that will cause over-stimulation. I’ve had to structure my life knowing what works and doesn’t work for me and my HSP. If you are an HSP like me, embrace it and learn how to manage it, and allow God to fulfill his unique purposes through you.