Have you ever wondered why we use the term “godmother?” And what exactly does the role entail? Has someone ever pulled a godparent aside and said, “Ok as a godparent, this is what the role demands from you?” If they did that for you, that’s great. I just never hear anyone doing it. Instead, there seems to be an assumption that when a close friend is…
THE WAIT IS OVER! Not Far From the Truth is available now. Click here to see where you can get a copy! If you have been a reader of this blog, this book is for you. Here is what you will find on the back of the book:What matters most is not if we encounter problems, rather it is how we cope with them. This book…
We live in a time where there is so much talk about self-love and self-care. Both good things if we do them right. But before we get to either of those, we need self-knowledge. In other words, we need information regarding our tendencies, personality traits, emotional states, and patterns of behavior. Do you know that we can’t truly be known by others when we don’t know ourselves?…
Happy almost 4th of July! It looks like July 4th weekend is easily becoming my poetry weekend. At this time 2 years ago, I wrote a poem about rest. This time, it's about suffering in silence. We’ve all experienced some sort of hardships in our lives. Sometimes it can be difficult to talk to others about it even though the more we hold on to things…
This is the story: Susan (let’s call her that) has been complaining about not wanting to go to this event, but not only that, she has been tasked with making the fried plantains for the event. But she doesn’t want to do any of it. What’s the event? It’s a party that some fellow members from her cultural group host every quarter of the year. They’ve…
The holidays are coming up. You might be feeling excitement, anxiety, dread, or a combination of all three. (Read these stress management tips I wrote). You might be asking, “Do I really have to go for that family event?” “Do I really have to travel this holiday season?” Maybe you feel a little pressure or an obligation to go visit certain family members even though you don’t…
Breakups are not fun (to say the least). You may feel relief, shame, guilt, fear, anxiety, and have thoughts of “not being good enough” and “why didn’t it work?” Depending on the circumstance, your loved ones may have a lot to say. Some of them may be glad because they didn’t like the person, others may truly not understand, and still others may contribute to the…
Knowledge does not equal behavior change. If it did, the world wouldn’t be in so much chaos (and I would be out of a job). But why doesn’t knowing directly lead to change? Because of our defenses and automatic responses developed from our upbringing, culture, beliefs, traumas, and sinful nature. Even the apostle Paul said in Romans 7:15-20 (NIV)I do not understand what I do. For…
It is inevitable that we hurt others intentionally or unintentionally. This is part of our fallen humanity. Life is not perfect, and neither are we. I have been in different situations where I have commented or acted in a way that has offended someone. It is hard to hear when someone approaches you with, “when you said…” or “when you did… I didn’t like it.” However,…
Last week, I wrote about church hurts, why they cause so much pain and how to correct our understanding of church. I promised to write about steps for forgiveness, but this post morphed into something else and it's absolutely worth the read!When someone has wronged us, it is not our first instinct to think about forgiveness. Our first response is usually anger or thoughts associated with…